i like how e title spells SOS. cos sometimes, it is when ppl are silent tt they cry out e loudest for help.
It’s late and I should sleep. But somehow I don’t feel like it, even though there’s nothing to do. The night is young and it is precious. It cradles fragile truths and wispy dreams. Truths we shared, dreams we dreamed; it’s the time when sometimes it’s silent and sometimes it’s still.
Silence is defined by the lack of noise. Silence announces its presence through the ringing in your ears. It’s when one is alone, in the padded room, when the walls close in that one hears the sound of silence. And one realizes that silence is deafening.
Stillness though, is completely different. Stillness has a voice – a soft murmur that oft goes unnoticed. No, not even that. It is a mere stirring in the tempest of our emotions. We hear it sometimes while walking back home at 2am in the night, wondering what we is doing with our lives. Or when we are with the love of our lives, and yet, feel lost and lonely.
ok fine so i’m emoing. stupid. i wish i could say i didn’t know why so at least, i’ll hv some sort of a defense in ignorance. but no ._. i do know why and it’s a lame reason. doesn’t help tt i’m readg ronald rolheiser’s ‘restless heart’ plus i just went to read my ‘Them’ post. lol it’s rlly quite well written actly. maybe there’ll come a time where i’ll be courageous enough to share it w e world. not now. sry for being cryptic. just need to indulge in escapism once in a while.
ok wow i do feel better. i’m doing e right thing at least. most of e times~ but ugh must remind myself. I MUST BE CHRIST-LIKE. I MUST BE LOVING. I CANNOT USE PPL. SENTIMENTALITY IS NOT LOVE. SO IS BITCHING FOR TT MATTER. I AM LOVED. FFFFFF. YOUR GRACE IS ENOUGH. STOP INDULGING IN YOUR OWN ANGST.
gotta <3 ronald rolheiser la. too imba alrdy. feel like just lifting his entire bk and chucking it in my blog and *nods* tts e whole of my angst. i can model my entire personal philo model on it sia.
Through a glass, darkly.