I’ve been trying to learn Jarrod Radnich’s Pirates of the Caribbean. After 3 weeks, I can complete the song, along with all the choppy pauses in between, in around 4 minutes. The YouTube video is 2 minutes long. That’s quite an achievement I think.
I realize I really enjoy music. I don’t speak much about it. Because the music that I like is generally not that mainstream (everyone comments on my playlists ._.). And also because I never really identified myself with it. But it’s an essential and integral part of my life. It always has been. From practicing 1h a day of piano and violin each to spending 14h a week in band practices, music is interwoven into my life. Maybe that’s why I don’t do the whole plugging-in thing. Because I get too caught up in what I’m listening to to concentrate on anything else.
I only properly realized this when I was playing for St Bern’s Retreat. Because I really enjoyed myself. Yes, it was the company. How can anyone not have fun when Stephen sings “asante sana squash banana” every few minutes, and Gwen tin-tin-marches to Our God is Greater. But it was also just feeling the ebb and flow of the music, gently moulding the mood, hitting the precise tipping points. It was immersive.
I went into the retreat with a desire to receive rather than to serve. Despite being part of the service team, I couldn’t help thinking that it would be a good time to just pray and reflect and to return to God. And perhaps, I could find some time or some space to just offer up my sullenness.
In the end, I only had one block of time on the first day to pray. The rest of the time was spent coping with the changes and having music pracs. Still, it was a good time of just being away from my unclearable todolist and my colorful calendar. And in a way, that one block was enough – for me to make a conscious decision to opt for joy. I thought to myself: I’m doing something I like, together with an awesome team of people. Why should I deny myself the fun and joy that God had weaved into the circumstances before me?
And that was when I properly started enjoying myself.
So I’m thankful. For the gifts of music, fun, friends and community. My personal relationship with God is still needs work. But Christmas is coming :D
“Perhaps that could be your prayer: I miss You.”
I didn’t realize that I did until I read this.