This holiday has been awesome. I’ve read 8 books, watched 13 movies, written 5101 words and played too many hours of DotA. I’ve watched a movie on my own, cafe-hopped (and found a regular one to haunt), and been for many spontaneous ados.
I told Simeon earlier this year that I envied his lifestyle. I envied him for not just having the freedom from, but the freedom to – the freedom to journey, to linger on to chat after a meeting, to change his plans for the day because he didn’t have one.
For 6 semesters, I’ve been missing out on this freedom (ironically, perhaps because of FOMO; but that’s for another post). By the time my holidays began, my calendar would be splashed with colours.
This holiday, I finally got a taste of this freedom. And ah-my-gahd it is sweeeeeet. (I suspect Having 5 retreats over 5 weekends isn’t exactly Simeon’s idea of slack; but it’s all relative.)
There was one idea that assuaged much of my guilty conscience of slacking too much: do not do things out of prestige. That idea purified many intentions and made many requests much easier to decline. But as the holidays come to a close and the omens of busyness loom on the horizon of school and Proclaim, I’m left wondering: is this pace of life what I’m meant to live? Or am I somehow lessened by doing so little? Am I being a selfish steward of God’s gifts?
Am I being an ingrate or am I being humble? When does being become boring? When does slow become sloth?
Or maybe (I suspect this may be the truth), it’s not so much about a single kind of pace or lifestyle, but more about rhythm – the Ecclesiastes 3 seasons idea – there’s a time for busyness and a time for rest. And if I’m reading the signs correctly, the time for busyness is about to begin again.
Oh wells. I can’t say I haven’t rested enough.